Currently I am operating in avoidance mode. This is different from procrastination mode, which is my general setting. This is much worse.
This is the mode where I do everything in my power to ignore __________ (fill in the blank). It’s like procrastination mode on steroids and almost always ends badly.
At this very moment I am avoiding the fact that I have to finish getting dressed and I have to walk outside into the gray, frigid, windy day that according to weather.com feels like 24 degrees. Gross!!! However I know that if I don’t choose to stop avoiding this then I’m in big trouble later because it is my only day to accomplish what needs to be done. So logically I’m writing a blog and I may even Facebook and Twitter about it. Sometimes big trouble isn’t good enough motivation. Mature huh?
Why am I avoiding it? Well for starters it’s bloody cold outside. But it’s also because I have to go shopping. Not the go to the store where it’s all labeled and you don’t need to talk to people shopping but the market shopping, requires interaction and language shopping. It’s difficult.
I’m also avoiding, or should I say attempting to avoid, the inevitable.
Why would I be avoiding tomorrow?
16 = 30
Today is the ides of November, meaning tomorrow is the day I turn 30. It’s a thought I’ve been trying to ignore all year.
This is the part where I could easily turn this into my “OMG I can’t believe that I will be 30 tomorrow and I STILL am single and to top it off I live in a foreign country where I don’t speak the language, and let’s just be honest the guys really aren’t very appealing and besides we don’t even speak the same language” sob story. For your sake I’ll try to avoid that as well.
While I can avoid shopping and suffer the consequences, this one I have to face in less than 24 hours.
I’m so dramatic. I know.
So why do we avoid things when we know we just have to suck it up and deal with it sooner or later? Wouldn’t just handling the situation now, facing it and moving out create a whole lot less anxiety in the long run?
I know that if I just get my shopping over with then it is done and I can check it off the to do list instead of creating more stress for myself later in the week. If it’s a good day, I may even walk away feeling accomplished.
I also know that thirty isn’t so bad. It’s just another day of life and most people think I’m still 26 anyway.
So I’m going to finish catching up on The Amazing Race and embrace the wind and shopping experience and maybe even 30.
(Though presents could make 30 easier to embrace… just saying) 😀